On the Run

With that terrifying thought, I moved swiftly through the aisles. I had made a mental checklist during my bus ride, and I tried to remember everything as I started filling my basket. Double-edged razor and extra blades. Emery boards, nail polish remover and quick-dry nail polish. A hair brush and a supply of bobby pins and scrunchies. Shampoo, conditioner, and a good pair of scissors. Moisturizer. Foundation. Compact. What shade should I get? The choices were bewildering. I selected and rejected dozens of products before I threw some in my basket and continued to my next objective.

The basket filled quickly. Sponges and brushes. Blusher. Eye shadow. Eye liner. Eyebrow pencil. Scented bubble bath. Women’s deodorant. An inexpensive cologne. Lipstick and a few pairs of nylons. I was sure I had forgotten something, but I had already spent a small fortune, and there was an opening at one of the checkout counters. I dumped my haul in front of a startled checkout clerk and watched in utter humiliation through my dark sunglasses as she contorted her face while she rang up my purchases. I must have turned bright red as I peeled $100 out of my wallet and picked up my collection of shopping bags. “Have fun!” she said as I retreated from the store.

I caught a bus back to my motel and stuffed my acquisitions into one of the cheap dresser drawers. I had $100 left to put together a complete woman’s wardrobe. I could chance a trip to an ATM machine, but I was determined to minimize my risk of exposure until my disguise was in place and I was ready to move the loot. So I headed back out to a nearby Marshall’s discount department store and tried to look casual as I wandered through the racks of women’s clothing, not knowing what to expect.

I was pleasantly surprised. A designer dress for $29. Panties, bra and a half slip for another $20. Clasp earrings and a fake gold necklace for $10. I even bought a matching scarf to accessorize my dress for $3. A black leather purse for $25. This time I had to stand in line at the checkout counter, and I studiously ignored the odd looks from the other customers and the clerk at the register as I paid for my purchases and headed back outside.